Bookending

[Hannah]

Bookending is a process of checking in with an activity you intend to carry out and checking in after you've done it. This should probably be a group but I think it can work just as well as a discussion.

[Hannah]

Okay, well, I always go first on my discussions since I set up what I need :) I have to read the feedback I got on my piece for my writing workshop and scared to death! So, here goes! Hopefully I'll be back to tell the tale. If I don't, you will know this finished me!

[Hannah]

Well, I've read through most of them. I was surprised to find most of them unbelievably stupid, things like, for example, if it was a comment on this one, would say "what is them? I'm confused". Uh..the feedback? How short an attention span can people who are willingly taking a writing class have? I found myself having disagreements of this sort when they offered feedback to others -- where I understood what the writer was saying perfectly, and people had problems with it. I found this sort of thing heartbreaking when I was doing music. Now I am older and accept that, as Einstein said, there is no end to human stupidity. I find it a valuable lesson to see that if I am not going to kill myself, I will have to be satisfied with achieving other things in life than connecting to others. It is a lesson that everyone who has gone down in history has also shown. We see them at a distance, at what they achieved. But we don't take what they had to fight, their environment, seriously anymore thanks to it. It is hard for me to be that arrogant, but it's not about arrogance to me anymore: it's either be me or let them kill me. I will also take into account some of the feedback which will help me grow as a writer, to pursue it to places I didn't necessarily expect to go or feel I needed to but which will provide me with the opportunity to explore them.

[Anne Westlund]

Hannah, people long to be connected to others and artists long to be understood. I don't think that is arrogant of you, it is just a fact of life. Sometimes I feel like I'm in an isolated little bubble with my crafts and especially my poetry, that noone gets what I'm about. Which is absolutely true of most of the people in my immediate environment. Then I get on CCS or Poetbay or with my poetry critique group and get some positive feedback for what I'm doing and I feel a whole lot better. People still say "stupid" things about my creations, but I have to either learn from what they are trying to say or let it roll off me. I love your accountability thread. I'll have to use it this week sometime, maybe for school. I'm in a funk today.

Anne

[Alfredo]

Hi Anne,

What is so interesting about what you said is that I have often thought about how some people I have never met before, half across the planet, REALLY get my music, yet some friends have no clue. I guess art is very subjective...some will get the work, some will not. And as much as our soul is in our work, it is not who we are. I know that my image as an artist is not who I am in my daily life, no matter how my audience chooses to perceive me or my PR people choose to sell me. Separating the two has not always been easy when sometimes it feels the work and me are one.

[Hannah]

The meaning of being an artist is doing something that's important to you! It gets tricky when what's important is other's approval of what you do! It was annoying because people didn't seem to have even read it. But it taught me that a lot of people won't! It's frustrating but nothing reaches everyone.

[Maureen]

Hannah, This is a great idea! I could see this in the Goals Group, but here is great too. This could really help me with my procrastination issues -- thanks so much for starting this!

I will try one ... I need to finish a collage I've been working on. I intend to get it done this weekend.

(Now I have somewhere to hold myself accountable ... I will reply when I get it done. Yikes -- I better get busy!)

[Dan Goodwin]

Hannah, so we can post here that we're going to do something, that we need extra motivation for or a way of holding ourselves accountable? Then we post when we've completed it?

[Hannah]

Yes, exactly, Dan.

That's great Maureen. Another thing that can be helpful is checking in even if you didn't take the action. That's also accountability.

[Maureen]

Thanks, Hannah ... that is good to know because I am checking back in now to say I didn't get my collage done :-(. Didn't even work on it! The weekend was busy and I wasn't feeling well -- I know, excuses, excuses! But it does feel good to be accountable, and to let someone know.

I will post again soon with another deadline for myself ! (Maybe I will meet that one...)

[Hannah]

It all helps to see ourselves more clearly. If you don't check with what actually happened, shame can do a number on you.

[Alfredo]

You know, reading some of the replies to this post was so refreshing right now. I needed that. I have debated taking time off from my work on composing, yet felt extremely guilty doing it. A voice in my head (and a few people) kept saying all the time "You should be working on your next album." At some point (see my blog post) I decided to say 'no' and feel OK about it. Four years of hard work, three albums, at what point does one say "I am taking a break and not going to feel guilty about it"?